Chris Evans uncharacteristically silent amid BBC pay cut talks

The highly paid disc jockey Chris Evans has been uncharacteristically quiet amid talk of pay cuts by other well paid male members of the BBC. Mr. Evans was unavailable for comment but his agent has issued the following statement:

“Chris is a huge talent and is worth every single penny of the £2,200,000 that he gets paid for his Radio 2 Breakfast Show and other BBC commitments. He is a once in a generation ….  ooooo look a squirrel. What? No I’m not trying to distract you at all, far from it but that was definitely a red squirrel. You don’t see many of those about nowadays. The invasive grey variety has really put a dent in their numbers to the point that they are seriously endangered. It’s funny isn’t it, when red squirrels were everywhere we didn’t take much notice of them but now that they are rare we value them much more highly. Chris is that red squirrel. We should cherish him and enjoy him while we can, whatever the cost. Otherwise all you will be left with is that Moyes-Grimshaw grey squirrel and trust me you really don’t want that.”